Sunday, September 12, 2010

Giving up my citizenship

I almost did it yesterday, I almost gave up my American citizenship. Why?? Because I went to Walmart, a ghetto Walmart.

Now, like me, I am sure most people have a pretty strong opinion about Walmart, love it, hate it, or indifferent. Me, I really like Walmart. Where else can I go and go and get goods at rock bottom prices? Where else can I find Kashi cereal, buy a flat screen t.v., a pair of socks, and new curtains all at the same time??? Nowhere I tell you, nowhere else. So, yea I am on the Walmart time!!! Way to go guys.

But yesterday, I almost gave up my citizenship while there. What is it about Wally world that caters to the lowest demographic of our society? Uhhh. While going up and down the isles, I heard the most crude, and ignorant junk coming out of peoples mouthes. I saw so many people with their shorts hanging down around their ankles, and their wife beaters (undershirts, around here we call them wife beaters) wrapped around their protruding bellies. And teenage girls walking around with "clothes" so scandalous, I almost grabbed a trench coat from the clothing section and threw it on them. And, what is the deal with people walking 5 deep, traveling approximately 1/2 a mile per hour, in an isle and not letting a sister through? Not even bothering to respond to my polite "excuses me" or the polite throat clears. At one point, I almost shouted at the top of my lungs mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooovvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvveeeeee. But, I didn't feel like getting shot yesterday, seeing as we had people coming over within the hour, and Walmart being the closest store to my crib, hence, my appearance at the store.

So being there, seeing what we are producing in this country made me want to give up my citizenship. Saying that is a lot for me, because I love this country. I am extremely patriotic, and I would pit my love for America against anyone. I mean, I think the only other person who loves this country more than I do is Glenn Beck, and the only reason I am bestowing the title upon him is because he cries all the time. Me, I am not really a crier, if I was, that might put me over the edge, but since I am not, I will give it to him.

So yes, I love America. She is in my top 3 loves. God, Family, America. I love her. But, come on, we need to start producing off spring better than this. Please, America.


Anonymous said...

and for this reason, I cannot and will not shop at Walmart.

Brooke said...

i went in the other day for a tea pot. you knew the kind you fill with water and put on the stove. i had to ask b/c i couldn't find one - they don't sell them any more.

do you know what my walmart does sell? a lunch box that sings "Rocky Top" the annoying UT Vols fight song.