Friday, January 3, 2014

100 Weeks of Confessions and a Giveaway!!!!

Its Friday Friends, and that means its time for Friday Confessions.

100 weeks ago I let it all hang out, and told y'all all the things that I had done wrong that week. Y'all laughed, and ended up confessing your sins too. Since then, we have met up here each Friday to  confess our sins and laugh at ourselves.  

This week is going to be a little different. I have compiled a list of my favorite confessions, some mine and some are yours (don't worry I didn't tell who wrote what!). And, when we are done, there will be a little give away to sweeten the deal! 

1.I steal candy from my kids trick or treat bags, party bags, ect, and I never fess up if they ask!
2. I talk to my dogs like they are people. 
3.I am in an intense game of Words with Friends with a coworker--I have used scrabble cheat for all of my plays. 
4. I come from a family who considers it a massive waste of time if you do not bring reading material into the bathroom with you. 
5. I run yellow lights. 
6. I spy on my neighbors with 2 different sets of binoculars that I keep on the fireplace mantle. 
7. I have not washed my hair in 4 days. 
8. I can go through 2 bags of chips in less than one week...by myself. 
9. I rarley wash the coffee pot. 
10. I cheated while playing foosball against my 12 year old nephew. 
11. We bought a box of cereal on Sunday night. I ate the entire box by Tuesday morning. 
12.I faked sleeping to avoid sex. 
13. I ate 57 almonds in one day. Yes, I counted. 
14. I show my husband my boogers, but only the good ones. 
15. Most of my panties have holes in them. 
16. Making grilled cheese sandwiches at the first of the week, I cut myself and bled on the cheese. When I noticed, I wiped the blood off then earmarked the sandwich so I could feed it to my husband instead of eating myself. 
17. I have worn my work pants 3 days this week. 
18. I got ready for work so fast I forgot to put on a bra. 
19. I use mens body wash in the shower. 
20. I have not brushed my hair in days. I let my husband brush it for me. 
21. I wore my underwear inside out. 
22. I stole french fries from a customers plate before delivering food this week. 
23. I just discovered what it means to drop it like its hot. Now, every time my husband asks me to do something, I make him drop it like its hot before I do anything for him. 
24. I stuck my hand in the ice machine at work. 
25. My dog french kisses me every morning when I wake up. 
26. I bragged to my husband about the size of my poop. 
27. I watched 20 episodes of The Big Bang Theory this week. 
28. I sharted on the treadmill. Thank God for the little girl in China who made the $2/3 pack of Wal-mart underpants that I purchased immediately following said treadmill incident. 
29. I accidentally drank out of the same cup that my dog did.
30. I pick my wedgies in public. 
31. I went to Chillis twice last week. Both for my birthday and I delighted in 2 free desserts. 
32. When I tuck in my shirts at work, I tuck them into my undies rather than my skirt. 
33. I didn't wash my hands after peeing. 
34. I bought a wet to dry straightener to dry my sweaty hair before work in the morning. 
35. I wore my herbivore shirt while I grilled our chicken for dinner. 
36. I accidentally farted during my massage. 
37. I said I was cutting sugar out of my diet. Then made cupcakes and ate half the batter. 
38. I ate a fermented orange. 
39. I ate an entire box of Morning Star Chick-n patties for a meal. 
40. I watched all the Twlight movies this weekend. 
41. I pooped my pants today on my run. I stopped a few times to suck it in, thought I had succeeded. 
42.I dropped M&M's on the office floor, and still ate them. 
43. I have not shaved my legs in 3 weeks. 
44. I openly picked a massive wedgie at the store last night. 
45. My alarm goes off at 4:45 every morning. I have not gotten out of bed before 6:30 once this week. 
46. I swallowed every pice of gum I ate this week. I ate probably 10 pieces. 
47. I kiss my dogs on the lips. 
48. I passed gas at Home Depot and my in-laws walked up right afterwards and stood in it. 
49. This week, I have broken a blow, pitcher, and a glass. 
50. I talked on the phone to a friend while pooping. 
51. I peed without washing my hands. 
52. When I have to spell the word banana, I sing the Gwen Stefani song to myself to make sure I spell it correctly. 
53. I reused the same coffee filter 3 days in a row because grocery day isn't until today. 
54. I ate chips for breakfast. 
55. The guy at the store had an accent. So I spoke with an accent too. 
54. When running with my dog, I don't let him stop to sniff or pee, so he will pee while running. 
55. I picked up a penny off the floor of a dirty bathroom floor. 
56. I have eaten out every day this week. 
57. I spilled coffee on a library book. Then confessed to the library. Then had to pay an exorbitant price to replace the book. 
58. I drank my dinner in the form of red wine last night. 
59. I killed a plant by pouring boiling water on it. 
60. I had gas, so I waited until my husband pulled the covers over his face as he was going to bed, the released. 
61.I cried openly at work.
62. I have worn the same socks to work every day this week. 
63. I put business cards in my bra. 
64. I had an off site meeting at work this week. When it finished, I went shopping rather than go back to the office. 
65. I ate more cookie dough than I baked into cookies. 
66. I had ice cream for breakfast. 
67. I bought a large package of Oreos last night. That package is already in the trash. 
68. I wore the same shirt to work 2 days in a row. 
69. I picked up my dogs poo in a bag, then left it in someone else's yard. 
70. I ate so many cookies, I know it was in the double digits. 
71. My husband criticized my hair. I responded "If you don't like it, go to beauty school to learn to fix it you big queen."
72. On Monday I made cookies for a dinner I was attending on Tuesday night. I ate so many I had to buy some at the grocery store on my way over. 
73. Sometimes when I sneeze, I sneeze on my husband. 
74. We got Subway for dinner. I ate my entire footlong before my husband finished his 1/2. 
75. I farted in my office, then a co worker came in to talk. 
76. I had a bag of skittles, and them them away. Then dug them out of the trash. 
77. I drove on the wrong side of the road to bypass school pick up line nonsense!
78. My husband ran 18 miles. I ran 11. Who took the nap this afternoon? Me.
79.I had road rage and yelled at someone, and didn't realize my window was down. 
80. I ate more candy that I gave away at Halloween. 
81. I got into an argument with my dog. 
82. I am too quick to judge people..there is this girl at my Crossfit gym who wears low cut tank tops and her fake boobs are always on display and she immediately annoyed me. I talked to her this week and she is probably the nicest person in the gym. 
83. I unbuttoned and unzipped my pants before going into the restroom stall at work. 
84. I threw a banana peel out my window. 
85. I have not plucked my eyebrows in 6 months. 
86. I lied to my sister in laws face about liking her food, then my husband came in the room and outed me. 
87. I talked about my bloggy friend like we know each other in real life. 
88. I have been late to work every day this week & I am already planning on leaving super early today since the boss is gone. 
89. We were at a party and I looked through the hosts restroom cabinets. 
90. I drove down a 1 way street. 
91. There is an apple core laying on my coffee table that has been there for 3 days. 
92. I am way over my Christmas budget.
93. I ate candy off my coworkers desk. 
94. I took change from my coworkers desk. 
95. I wore the same pants, shoes, socks, and sweater to work this week. 
96. I am marathon training and have run 3 miles this week. 
97. I pick my nose while driving my car and rub the boogies on my car seat. 
98. I walk around my neighborhood at night and stop in front of houses with the window open to see inside their houses. 
99. I played on my iPad while taking a bath.
100. My boss gave me a cookie. I threw it away, but told her it was delicious.

There they are, the top 100 confessions from the past 100 Fridays. You guys are too funny!

Now for a little giveaway!

I have a $100.00 VISA gift card for you. This is not a sponsored post, this is $100.00 of my own money that I am giving to you, my friends. Each week, you make me laugh, and smile, and I want to give something back to you.

To win, all you need to do is leave me your confession in the comments. P will randomly select a winner, and it will be announced on Friday, January 9th. Giveaway open to US residents only. (Sorry--fine print on the gift card)

Fess up my friends!





15 comments:

Denise said...

no way! this doesn't even feel right commenting to enter. Seriously?

regardless, this list is hilarious and totally made my morning!!

now, put that money away!

lesley: the dream tree said...

aw, that's too sweet of you! you didn't have to do that.

i let my dog poop on the sidewalk and didn't pick it up because it was too cold out. i haven't washed my hair in 4 days. haven't been to the gym in months but pay for it each month. ugh.

Ashten said...

I think you should keep the gift card because your confessions are the best!

1. My dad caught me in a lie at the age 25. He mailed me a book, I said I received it.. the other day he sent me a picture of the package that was returned to his house. He said- didnt you tell me you started reading this book?

M Ripples said...

1. I can't go to work without my cell phone because I can't stand not being able to check blogger every 1/2 an hour or so.

2. My van is so messy, I'm embarrassed by it but not motivated enough to clean it out.

3. It's nice that everyone is so polite to tell you to keep the gift card, but I'm totally commenting because I want to win it.

4. This is the third time in the last year that I've paid for a Weight Watchers membership and haven't made an effort to follow the plan. Yet another wasted $60.

Thanks!

NapaKat said...

You're so sweet, I may make you keep your money, but I love this!

1- I let my daughter buy sugar cookie poptarts this week, because it means I don't have to get out of bed and make her breakfast

2- My boyfriend feels unnecessary guilt for going to a party I couldn't make it to on NYE... I may or may not be letting him make it up to me

3- I have spent more time blogging and reading blogs than working at work this week... like I am now.

Denise said...

twist my arm:

1) I hate having to run holding a bag of poop. it makes me mad at my dog actually.

2) I went forward for prayer at church last Sunday for my son. I can't figure out who he is right now and I don't think he can either. The pastor prayed the most perfect prayer.

3) I love my iphone.

4) I "forgot" to cancel my amazon prime membership so had my kids create their christmas list on amazon then I just added their items to my cart and waalaa my shopping was done!

5) I have watched 4 seasons of Parenthood in the last 3 weeks.

6) tomorrow is my husband's birthday (50) and we are going out with friends. Getting all dressed up and everything...I'd rather just stay home.



3)

Denise said...

not sure why the random 3) is there!

Brooke said...

i took a snip and highlighted the confessions that belonged to me, then forwarded them to my sister, hubby, and bestie. cause i'm proud.

Holly @ Run With Holly said...

Hmmm....I think I only caught one or two of mine on there. I'm going to have to work on better confessions this year. ;-) For this week?

1. We went to Hong Kong to go hiking (my request). After 2 full days of hiking, I got annoyed that he didn't want to go for a short hike on our last morning there.

2. Two days after returning from our trip (during which we pretty much ate out all the time), I still haven't been to the grocery store or cooked a meal.

3. I had 3 gingerbread cookies and a tiny container of yogurt at 3 PM yesterday and called it lunch.

4. I totally goofed the choreography in my most recent spin class. I just kept on pedaling, and made the class do a super long, hard, sit-climbing segment. It was so much fun that I may do it again tomorrow. *evil laugh*

[I'm commenting for fun. I live outside the US, so give the giftcard to someone else. ;-)]

Stephanie Gossett said...

1. I peed through my panties on the toilet after not sleeping for a week when my kids had the stomach flu. Yep. Totally did that. I was half asleep...thought I pulled them down.

2. I love your blog and confessions WAYYYY more than I should. You are so real!

3. I lost a week's pay of work when my little girls were sick (and a pair of perfectly good pair of panties.) This would be a huge blessing to me, and my family to win.

Thank you for this chance. It is very generous of you to do this for someone. Good luck everyone!

ninigossett at gmail dot com

Rochelle said...

I yell at my son all the time about how much he farts, but I know I fart just as much if not more.

mhart1993 said...

While running with my dog, I had to pee so badly, I sat on someone's lawn and peed. Luckily, I had on black shorts and it was raining!

Sarah Kopf said...

I confess.....that yesterday I ate my husband's buffalo dip and told him the dog must have got it. The plate WAS on the coffee table, unattended, for 10 minutes. I was hungry. I'm not sorry. Lol

Sarah
www.thinfluenced.com

Sarah

christina neumann said...

Honestly, I can't beat any of yours. They are too funny.
Ok, I snooped in my sons room,he's 19, to see what he bought his girlfriend for Christmas. . ..?
Not very exciting. I live a very boring life.:(

christina neumann said...

Honestly, I can't beat any of yours. They are too funny.
Ok, I snooped in my sons room,he's 19, to see what he bought his girlfriend for Christmas. . ..?
Not very exciting. I live a very boring life.:(