Slow Sunday

Sunday afternoons are turning into my favorite day of the week. I love how P and I lay on the couch and watch football. The days go by slow and it is the perfect time to lay around and take cat naps. I tend to piddle around in the kitchen, clean up a little, and just rest. It is the perfect afternoon.
This year, I have been trying really hard not to do school work on the weekends. If I have to, it seems like it ruins the day. I have made a point to stay late during the week so that my weekends are free from work. It feels so great to know that I don't have any work to do, and that I can spend the weekend doing what I want to do.

Number 2

Marathon number 2, done.
I never thought I would do a marathon, much less 2. Now, a full week later, it feels like I ran a year ago. My first marathon, I clocked 4:52. Last week I ran in 4:24.
I made a major improvement, and I am proud of my time, but, I felt like I could have done even better. I honestly felt like I could have done it in under 4 hours.
I have to admit when I crossed the finish line and saw my time I was somewhat dissapointed. I know that I have no reason to feel bad about my time, at all, but somehow, I don't feel proud of it either. I don't know if it is just my competitive side coming out, or if I am truly disappointed. I don't know.
Will I do another one? Perhaps. I have not run for a week, and it feels good to rest. I have walked a ton, and lifted weights, but I have not run yet. Maybe today I will go out for a run.

Silencing the Doubt Monster

Last night after work I went to the marathon expo to pick up my packet. Being there did not help with the butterflies. I am nervous. I really am. As I walked around the expo center trying different foods, (a yogurt---uhh it was horrible, a beer--it was yummy!) I stopped and looked around and realized, that exactly one year ago, I was in the exact same spot. Wow, life has changed in a year, big time. And, when I think about the future, there will be even more big changes within the next year. (I have a ton to fill yall in on, which includes yet another move in a few months)But, as I slowly walked the isles, I realized that I could smile because I really am not the same person I was 365 days ago, which is a good thing. But, one thing that stayed the same was, my nerves.
I am battling the doubt monster right now. I have been nervous all week. My stomach has been in knots all week. Uhhh. I don't know why I am doubting right now. I have to trust the training. Yes, my training has been a bit different this year as opposed to last year. I cut 2 weeks out of training, simply due to when I started. I have even skipped a few runs, something I would never have done last year, at all. This year, the difference is that I am listening to my body more, and trying to adapt the program to fit my life. If I got home, and my body was just exhausted from the run before, rather than trying to white knuckle my way through it, I would rest, and run the next day. Or, I would run, walk, run, in the early stages to find my rhythm. And the funny thing is, my running has been better. My times have been way faster than last year. My p.r. so far is 20 miles in 3:03. That's the best I have ever done. Plus, I have done 20 miles 3 different times this training season. I have gone for quality miles over quantity miles.
I just keep telling myself, I can do this, I can do this. I am trying to silence that doubt monster once and for all.

T-3 Days

Sunday, just three full days from now, marathon number 2.
I am nervous. I think its because I know how hard it is. I know the pain that I am about to subject myself to.
But, I know I can do it. For the past 16 weeks, I have run late at night, or early in the morning. I have sacrificed sleep and down time to hit the pavement. I know I can do this, but I am just nervous.