Wednesday, May 15, 2013


I met this woman. Within our first 5 minute conversation, I judged her. That's a lie, within the moment of looking at her, I judged her.

She is petite, blonde, drives a really big SUV. Her hair always looks good, she dresses well, and is always put together. I have never seen this woman look bad. She carries a huge Louie V purse, and I have never seen so much as her nail polish chipped.

Just by her outward appearance, I judged her. I had her pegged as capital D A L L A S. I looked her up and down once and I told myself, she is a trophy wife, with no substance. I disliked her within 20 seconds of laying eyes on her.

There is a problem with what I did. I judged her, which left me no room to love her.

What took me by surprise is that this woman is pretty great. It should not have, but it did. She is kind, funny, and caring. We were chatting Monday morning, and she said something, and it struck a cord with me. She gave me a bit of insight into her life, and it stopped me in my tracks. In just a short sentence, I suddenly saw that her life was not what I expected it to be. She has not had the charmed life I assumed she had. She has fought and struggled. There have been tears, trials, hardships, and valleys. She has had a tough road, but managed to fight her way through it, and rather than letting it make her bitter, it made her better.

We have made plans to have lunch next week and talk. To really get to know each other, and to share life experiences.

Shame on me for judging. Shame on me for not giving her a chance. Thank goodness for her that pressed on and pursued a friendship.She continued to be kind, warm, and caring to me.

I think its the kindness of others in the light of meanness or rudeness that is so striking. And humbling.
It is humbling really, being on the receiving end of undeserved kindness.

I can only hope and pray that I will no longer be a victim to my own preconceived ideas and notions.

Have you ever been unfairly judged? Have you unfairly judged others?


Michelle said...

I have been unfairly judged, and I have judged others as well. I need to learn to stop though, just as you said.

~Carla~ said...

Great post... I think we've all done both things.. :(

Brooke said...

judging other is what i'm best (worst) at!

lesley: the dream tree said...

i have been judged because people perceive me as a dumb blonde, but on the other hand i judge way more than i should. who am i to judge someone else? it makes me sick that i do this, but i can't help it.

what a great story though. you and her will probably become really good friends because of all this. that's cool.