1. I ate 10 mini cupcakes in under 5 minutes yesterday.
2. I bent down to pet my dog and he stuck his tongue in my mouth, so I basically French kissed him.
3. A bird pooped on me while walking to the train. It got on my hand. I wiped it on the train seat.
4.i passed gas while face timing with the in laws.
Ok, fess up peeps.